F’ Sean Penn, man. Bill Murray should have won. oh well, at least LoTR cleaned house.
Here’s some Scarlett to look at.

bedtime for me.

As usual i’ll be watching the Academy Awards tonight. And taping them. not that i ever watch them again, but you know. they don’t ever rerun ‘em, so what the hell.

anyhow, party starts at 6pm (cst), and you can now watch US watching THEM.

TITLE: Talk About Indecent..
CATEGORY: Current Affairs
DATE: 02/25/2004 11:08:32 PM
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Nothing enrages me more than censorship. Words is words, fuckers. well, now i’ve just about reached the end of the line. all this shit w/ janet jackson’s boob has been simply ridiculous. now, because of this, things have just gotten way out of hand.
Today Clear Channel (the radio nazis) have suspended the Howard Stern Show until they deem it “decent”. What a bunch of fucking rat bastard nazis. First gay people can’t be people now people can’t listen to the radio. I guess the US Gov’t has run out of OTHER countries to piss off, so they’ve turned to their own. Why do i feel like its 1960? We’re doomed.
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TITLE: There’s No Place Like Home
CATEGORY: Travel
DATE: 02/20/2004 11:32:43 PM
—–
Thank God.

I just got back from a week in San Francisco. I feel like i’m still there. Mentally, i haven’t returned. for the past three days, my thoughts have remained on the West Coast. My body goes through the motions, but i feel like a zombie back from the Great Beyond. I loathe this “city”. It was so nice to be in a place with landscaping and people and life. Here, just more zombies, and homeless (or not homeless) people threateningly asking for change, or smokes, or a ride “just over the River”. Fuck this shithole. When we were at the airport to depart San Fran, i imagined going to the bathroom and sneaking out of the terminal to deliberately miss my flight. I’d find some way to survive. Survive. If i’m to survive, i have to escape this filth. After five days of smelling the crisp ocean air, we pulled in the driveway, and opened the car doors to the pungent fumes of the fish mutilation factory three blocks away. The day before was Garbage Day, which means, the Truck had recnetly limped down the short street, bleeding foul garbage juice the entire way, like an giant wounded metal animal with gangreen. The dried garbage blood-trail is still visible on the pavement, and the odor lingers.

Thrilled to be home. No place like it.

anyhow, here’s some photos of the trip
and here’s some more taken w/ the camera phone.
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TITLE: Super Bowel
CATEGORY: Sports
DATE: 01/30/2004 11:05:04 PM
—–
So, Super Bowl Sunday is coming up. Who’s playing again? Oh, wait, its John Kerry vs Howard Dean, right? Is is just me or has the big game been overshadowed by the Democratic Race? I mean, thats fine. I’d rather get together with my friends, get drunk, eat chicken wings and watch a couple of politicians beat each other up on national tv anyday, than watch two teams that aren’t my favorites. Actually, i’d rather watch four hours of ALIAS. I just rented Season 1 (6 discs) of this show, i love it. I’d always wanted to watch it on ABC, but i never knew what was going on, so finally i just decided i should start at the beginning, which is what i’ve done. Its great. Like if James Bond and Lara Croft had a love child.
Good Stuff.

oh yeah, and here’s some pix of some projects i’ve been working on.
Set up a 29 gallon aquarium i inherited from Denny, just added some new fish tonight, and the iTerra, an old Apple Display monitor i modified into a terrarium. So far just has plants and dirt and some kinda moss from the pet store. oh, and a heating rock, for the $5 lizard i plan on stickin’ in there.
enjoy.
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TITLE: “Oh Fuhhhh…”
DATE: 01/05/2004 09:23:30 PM
—–
i know its WMV, but its worth it. TechTV Clip.
—–
TITLE: STOP THE PRESS!
CATEGORY: Music
DATE: 12/20/2003 12:26:54 PM
—–

in the song “Lola” by the Kinks..was Lola a transvestite? damn, i never listened to the lyrics before today in the car….crazy shit.
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TITLE: New Favorite Quote
CATEGORY: Current Affairs
DATE: 12/08/2003 10:10:16 PM
—–
From John Kerry, in Rolling Stone Magazine:
:
“I voted for what I thought was best for the country. Did I expect Howard Dean to go off to the left and say, ‘I’m against everything’? Sure. Did I expect George Bush to fuck it up as badly as he did? I don’t think anybody did,” Kerry told the youth-oriented magazine.

full story at New York Post Online
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TITLE: Dirty Little Pictures
CATEGORY: Web/Tech
DATE: 12/08/2003 09:20:51 PM
—–
So i saw this nifty li’l camera on The Screen Savers a few weeks ago, and said to myself “self, get that”. So i did. Its great. its so tiny i take it everywhere i go. And whats better, i set myself up a moblog at textamerica.com where i can email my photos to the site and it automatically puts ‘em up. You can visit my photo blog by clicking over to the left at Look at my Stuff. I love that this is not a very high resolution camera, and also hard to control what your shooting. It makes the final images pretty interesting. Never quite sure what i’m going to end up with. Its nice little cam though. Handles indoor florescent lighting pretty well. Not so great in low-light, but great outdoors. Anyhow..keep checking out my stuff i’ll probably post there more than here.
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TITLE: Jerry’s Skids
CATEGORY: Television
DATE: 12/03/2003 10:54:45 AM
—–
Poor Jerry Van Dyke. Born as the brother the more famous and ultimately more funny, Dick, he thought he could follow in his footsteps and be …funny. He’s not. Poor Jerry. Turned down the role of Gilligan. Whoops. Bad career move there, Jer’. Best known perhaps as the “comic relief” on “COACH”..comic relief you ask? yeah i know the show was SUPPOSED to be funny, but it really wasn’t. and i guess Jerry was the funniest part. bumbling hyper guy. still not very funny. Well, now Poor Jerry has been reduced (from an already reduced man) to doing BIG LOTS commercials. Need i say more? Jerry Van Dyke - Hollywood Loser.
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TITLE: I see ColorsALLOW PINGS: 0
CATEGORY: Web/Tech
DATE: 12/02/2003 06:51:50 PM
—–
here’s some kinda cool (but expensive) shit. I dig computer mods, so check out COLORWAREPC.COM
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TITLE: Lazy
CATEGORY: Lessons in Negativity.
DATE: 12/02/2003 03:28:05 PM
—–
I’m lazy. Or just unmotivated. Hard to say. In the movie “Office Space” , they pose the question, “if you had a million dollars, what would you do?” the idea of the exercise is, whatever you answer to the hypothetical question, is what you should be doing in life. For example, if you say, “Buy a buncha computers” you should be some kinda computer engineer or something in real life. But Peter, the main character, says “nothing, i’d do nothing”..thats sort of how i feel. if i had a million bucks, i don’t thinki’d do NOTHING, at least not ALL the time. i’d do nothing most of the time, then maybe some wednesday i’d say “i’d like to hang out in London this weekend” so i’d hop a plane and visit london for awhile. I think i’d probably do a lot of traveling actually. not ALL the time, but surely more than i do now. I’d spend most of the time, slacking off, watching movies and swimming i think. And gadget shopping. gadget shopping, watching movies, drinking and traveling. So if THAT is what i’m supposed to do in REAL life, someone tell me where i sign up for the job. Exactly. there isn’t one.

i’m fuckin’ doomed.

I’m doomed to spend my life mostly unhappy. i mean , sure i have happy MOMENTS, but what got me thinking was “what do i really want to do w/ my life?” and the words above, was the best i could come up with.

So now what?
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TITLE: Love my job.
CATEGORY: Lessons in Negativity.
DATE: 11/14/2003 03:42:06 PM
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So just when you think “man life sucks”, God swings by and says “hey little guy, cheer up, life REALLY sucks.”

we just had meeting here at work where we were all informed that as of Nov. 27th none of us (save for a few sales ppl) had a job here. “Happy Holidays guys!” Turns out our parent company, Cipi, in Boston decided we weren’t turning enough profit and they were shutting us down. Well, everyone except the ppl that might bring in more money, of course. Buncha fucking cocksucking rat coozebag bastards. I’ll be getting a gigantic severance package amounting to $390.00. I think i’ll retire to the Hamptons on that, and hopefully get my ass run over by Lizzie Grubman, or have a shot at Paris’ ass. aww yeah. fuckbitchshitcumsters.
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TITLE: Policies.
CATEGORY: Lessons in Negativity.
DATE: 11/14/2003 03:46:30 PM
—–
i just got this email about how to deal with art that we’ll need to send to Cipi in boston. also posted under it, is my reply:

—–Original Message—–
From: Donna Niven
Sent: Friday, November 14, 2003 2:40 PM
To: DONNA SIMMONS
Cc: Rob Brosofsky; Sean L’Estrange;
Subject: RE: Labels/Domes

I am trying to set up a policy for your labels.

When you need an order could you please fax over a copy of the art with
all the details and let me know that you faxed something via e-mail. If
it is a new job please e-mail the artwork to Donna Simmons.

This will be the easiest way for me to keep track of your jobs and also
we will have a hard copy of what is should look like.

Please let me know if this works for you.

Thanks for your help!!!

Donna M. Niven
Comprehensive Identification Products, Inc.
Custom Product Manager

From: Art Dept
Date: Fri Nov 14, 2003 3:37:11 PM America/Chicago
To: Donna Niven
Subject: Re: FW: Labels/Domes

hahah, yeah right.
I’ve got my own policy about labels/domes, it goes like this:

whenever there’s art you need us to do, someone from cipi can fly on down and BEG ME to let them kiss my ass, and if i decide they can kiss my ass, they can proceed to kiss it until its raw, AND THEN, they can eat a big fat juicy brown turd out of it. After that i will give them the appropriate art and they can take said art back to boston with them and wipe their shit-encrusted lips with it.
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TITLE: Paris in the Fall
CATEGORY: Current Affairs
DATE: 11/14/2003 03:16:17 PM
—–
I was flipping thru channels yesterday when i saw the, now infamous, green glow of rich kids having sex. I quickly flipped back to it, turns out Fox News was talking about Paris Hilton’s sex video, of course. I just HAD to hear what these douche-bags were reporting about this, clearly, newsworthy story. What’s better is they had Lizzie “I Ran Over 16 People In the Hamptons” Grubman on. I didn’t catch the whole report, but the part i saw was pretty great.

Generic Fox News guy: “Lizzie, what do you think Paris will do next?”
Lizzie: “well, if i know Paris, and I think i do, she’ll get through this. Paris is a survivor.”

I nearly spit my breakfast juice all over the room. “PARIS IS A SURVIVOR” hahaha…yeah, must take a lot of endurance to get through life when everything is handed to you on a platter lined with gold. I sure hope she survives this one. Life of luxury can be such punishment. I’m sure other survivors, like John McClain and Jessica Lynch can identify. Shit, even some actors, i’d say, are bigger survivors than some spoiled rich kid. The ones that had to starve, and work waiter jobs before they got their big break. I think even David Hasselhoff is a bigger survivor than Paris Hilton. I saw an interview where he said he had to live in a commune with ten other out of work actors before he got his Knight Rider gig. How sad is that? HOW SAD IS IT if David fucking Hasselhoff is a bigger survivor than you. But hey, Paris, keep up the good work, my only other critisism, if you know you’re being filmed, and your partner knows he’s being filmed, why not just TURN ON THE DAMN LIGHT?
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TITLE: Yay.
CATEGORY: Lessons in Negativity.
DATE: 11/10/2003 02:56:47 PM
—–
I’m so good at posting on my blog. look at me, over a month. what do i have to say?
jack shit.
probably going to move out of my house, then out of this godforsaken dump of a city.
need $$.
who doesn’t?
i have too much stuff..need to minimalize.
i’m not so good at minimalizing. Need to read the “Dummies Guide to Getting Rid of Shit”

fuck this. blogs suck.

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TITLE: more of this
CATEGORY: I Woke Up This Morning…
DATE: 09/28/2003 05:03:21 AM
—–
well fuck me running….more celebrity mingling dreams last night. I just woke up from driving around CA for an hour or so with Jennifer Aniston. (Don’t tell Brad) ..god i’m such a dork. we didnt’ have sex, but she accidentally made out w/ me in a bathroom of some hotel we were at. Apprently some sort of conference was going on. beats me. she kisses nicely.

gotta get out of this town. gotta get out of this town…ugh..

lyric in my head right now, over and over:

“..he said, ‘Bill, i believe this is killing me,’ as the smile ran away from his face, ‘I believe that i could be a movie star, if i could get out of this place..’”
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TITLE: Welcome back, Mat!
CATEGORY: I Woke Up This Morning…
DATE: 09/25/2003 10:57:15 AM
—–
Thanks.

I had celebrity dreams all night. I remembered what my goal in life has been since about 7th grade. And how off track i am right now. Sometime around age 13 or 15 or something, all i ever wanted to do was become famous. not like, “i’m going to kill a Beatle”-famous, but be an actor or director or something. i love films, and i actually do love hollywood. I want to live in beverly hills and go to the Oscars, and mingle at After Award Show parties. Mostly, i want access to all those Hollywood Hotties, so i can fuck them. or at least have a shot at fucking them. I’d have a better shot at fucking them, than i do now! Must go back to how i was never one of the “cool kids” in highschool, but i always wanted that cheerleader or hot chick who dated the jock. probably has something to do with it. nevertheless…must be a sign that i need to get off my ass and get back on track. fuckin’ wasting my time. wasting my time. wasting my time…..

Oh yeah, so in my dream, i did get to fuck Pam Anderson, and well,…lets just say, it wasn’t tight and warm. go figure. but i’d do it again, don’t get me wrong.

—–

TITLE: Racing towards the end.
CATEGORY: Lessons in Negativity.
DATE: 08/22/2003 08:56:43 PM
—–
Sometimes when i think about how absolutely fucked up this planet has become, i wonder how many people thought the exact same things 100 years ago. The probably figured “how can it get worse than this.” and really, yeah, some things were pretty bad, like the Black Plague and the Holocaust. but we made it. only to wake up and fuck up more shit the next day. But back to what i was about to say. oh yes, i was about to comment on Time. and how, if it is true that each one of our every decisions and actions dictates the outcome of future events, imagine how many billions of bad decisions are made each day, spiralling us all towards a disastrous future. Terrifying.
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TITLE: And so…
CATEGORY: Lessons in Negativity.
DATE: 08/19/2003 01:14:14 AM
—–
…fucking blogs. Welcome one and all you silly twats. Looks like ol’ Mat has gotten into the vodka tonight. nothing good can come of that. Edgy. Now i’ve gone and subscribed to some ridiculous blogging circus sideshow massacre. Massacre of my wallet. as if it hasn’t already been torn to shreds by my internet consuming addiction. nevertheless, here i am. i welcome myself to this new outlet for the sewage that runs through my veins. let it spew all over your eyes as you read what is to come. i love you.

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